That is how I felt boarding the plan with my sweetie on Wednesday morning to the Dominican Republic for our combo belated honeymoon, YOLO Vacation! The title above is from a country song by Justin Moore. Yes, I do like country music…… and too many other kinds to list.
As I write this, I am sitting on our patio outside our room at the Excellence El Carmen resort. Todd and I keep looking at each other and just laughing. We can’t believe we are here. We have talked about this since before we married in September 2017. For those of you in the benefits broker business, you know that to be the worst time of year to take a week long vacation. So, we told ourselves we would wait until the spring. That spring, I moved into a new position at work and had a child getting ready to graduate high school so we told ourselves, we would make our honeymoon into a 1 year Anniversary trip.
Memorial Day was when I first felt the small painful lump in my lower back. Thus began the journey we are still on to battle for my health. I remember feeling such panic at the thought of my life being cut short. No, not now. I was so happy and content in every other aspect of life. My job, my family, my husband, my friends…..all had finally meshed together into so much more than I could have asked or imagined. Was this God’s way of saying I had become too complacent, had I become too stuck on myself and needed to be brought back down a notch or 2? Was I being punished for something? God knows I have been no angel in life, he knows because I had brought it all to him throughout my life and asked his forgiveness. Still, was this the consequence I could not avoid? For those of you who have battled an illness or disease, did you have any of these same thoughts?
Deep down I know that we live in a sinful, flawed world full of death and disease. That is not God’s plan for us. So, I continue to pray and battle this disease. I will also cherish every moment, experience, milestone and memory on the path.
Todd and I knew when we married at ages 49 and 46 that we might never be able to celebrate a 50th Anniversary but the possibility of 25 was there. I want the 25…. We may not celebrate it the way are today but we will celebrate. Just as we are celebrating this week. Praise God for the time we are having here together and Hell Yeah, we are having a party down here in the DR!!